The journey of motherhood is truly a magical one; a miracle to say the least. Having a child has been the most challenging yet rewarding experience of my life. Becoming a mom has healed me in ways I didn’t even know were possible. As a parent you are devoted to caring for this tiny human you just gave birth to – who is entirely dependable on you for everything twenty-four-seven. That undoubtedly can take a toll on you physically and emotionally. On the other hand you are blessed with the purest of souls – a piece of you – that fills your heart with copious amounts of love and joy – you didn’t know existed. You can’t quite understand it until you experience it yourself – and when you do – you understand why people do it over and over again.
Having a baby in my mid-thirties was something I was frankly scared of. I always thought I would be that young wife and mom. Culturally, that is how I was raised; finish school, get married, have kids. Truthfully, I am grateful that things worked out the way they did and I had my first child at thirty-five. I definitely was not ready to become a mom in my twenties. I was still trying to figure out life. My thirties brought so much clarity and balance – I was so ready for that next chapter – my body however I feared wasn’t. How will my body cope with carrying a baby and give birth in my mid-thirties? Will I get pregnant easily or will it be a struggle? Questions I thought about often in the past few years.
To my sheer luck (no pun intended) we got pregnant so easily. We hardly tried and it just happened – before we even made it down the aisle! To read the full story about how we found out we were pregnant while wedding planning read my ‘When It Rains It Pours’ Blog. Here I was at 35 years old, engaged to the love of my life, planning my dream wedding, and pregnant. Once I got over the shock of it all happening at the same time I was on cloud nine. All the fear and doubt I had faded and I was over the moon.
My first trimester was easy. It went by pretty quickly. My second trimester was definitely my favorite. I felt incredible. Some days I forgot I was even pregnant. Did I mention I got married while six months pregnant?! My third trimester was rough. It wasn’t until month eight where things took a turn for the worse.
I woke up one morning and I couldn’t step on my left leg. I tried to walk and immediately felt a warm, tingly, stabbing sensation running from my lower left back and down to my toes. Hello pregnancy sciatica is that you!? To put it simply it was AWFUL. I was bedridden and completely debilitated for a month. I tried everything; stretching daily, chiropractic adjustments, prenatal massages, pelvic floor sessions, hot and cold packs, warm baths, epsom salt – you name it. I even went to the emergency room one day to get an MRI and get a specialist’s opinion. The consensus was the same “keep doing what you’re doing, It’ll go away once you have the baby”. My OB recommended a cesarean section to bypass the possibility of an intense (back) labor and my sciatica getting worse. It’s not what I wanted for my birth journey but I knew it was the right call. We went in at exactly 39 weeks and Eleanor Rose was born on October 21, 2024 at 7:55am. The whole procedure was completed in less than one hour and before I could process any of it my sciatica pain had disappeared and I was a mom – holding my baby girl in my arms. Two days later I got discharged from the hospital and we were going home as a family of three!
To my complete surprise I woke up the next morning to my the same left leg strikingly swollen – from the knee down to my toes. My leg looked like a ninety year olds woman – something felt off. I called my OB and within seconds of explaining my symptoms I was advised to go to the emergency room for an ultrasound screening. Within minutes (perks of living in a small town) we discovered I had several DVT’s (Deep Vein Thrombosis) aka blood clots in my deep veins – fun! The immediate concern was that the blood clots could get bigger and or travel to my heart and lungs – scary stuff. I was prescribed blood thinners immediately. I was nursing exclusively. I had to get on the injectable blood thinners as the pill option is not safe for a baby – and so my postpartum journey had begun!
I am now six months postpartum and my blood clots have dissolved. I am off the blood thinner medication. Seeing my happy healthy baby smile everyday is the best feeling in the world. Getting married, having a baby, and starting a family was truly the best decision I ever made – I‘ve never been happier. Sharing my pregnancy and birth journey with you was important to me – both as a founder and advocate for female empowerment – but also as a new mom in the community figuring it out. I am so grateful for my health and for the gift of being able to create life. The appreciation I have gained for women who have gone through the journey of pregnancy, birth, and motherhood with little to no help is immense – YOU ARE A BADASS! There is no one experience that is the same and that is what makes it so beautiful. It’s important to lift and support each other and share our stories so that we don’t feel alone. There are surely days that are hard and long but having a good partner and support system makes it so much better. If you’re a new mom reading this or considering becoming one – I promise you it is so worth it – you got this!
With love,
